Reindeer food, kind heartedness & the New Year

I haven't posted much at all later, so I feel like I have lots I want to say.  First, our kids are growing up so quickly.  I truly feel like they age years in the blink of an eye.  And all this while M is growing so much far from us.  It is bittersweet, I know he is well cared for and I appreciate what the Korean government is trying to do, but hard because in our hearts he is already a C, and we want him home!

January 1, 2012 will be a very important day.  First it is P's 5th birthday!  How 5 years have gone by this quickly I will never comprehend.  2nd, it marks the new year when Korea will begin processing emigration paperwork again.  A paperwork line that we hope we are near the front of.
Christmas has come quickly this year. It has been difficult to stay focused on enjoying the now, while wanting the new year to come so the paperwork can move again.

This is a paper T did in school last week.  It makes me so proud to see the kindness she has in her heart.  I am so thankful for such kind, beautiful, sweet children.  They are a great distraction from the wait for M.
To those that are waiting for their 1st child to come, my thoughts are with you during this Christmas holiday.  I am sure it is difficult.  And my thoughts are with the birth families out there that celebrate without their babies too.  I wish them all peace and joy during these times.

Merry Christmas from all of us!

Merry Christmas to all

May all your wishes come true as well this season and in 2012!

Thankful

In honor of the season, here are some things I/we are grateful for (in no particular order).

~ amazing friends:
- like the kind that takes time out of her busy schedule to take amazing pictures of my family for me. Without her, I would only have my pitiful attempts at pictures.
- friends who love our children like their own. Ones that think of them even when they are out of town visiting their own families! I don't know if they will ever truly realize how much my kids love them, and more importantly how grateful I am for them.
- friends that will stand in the cold in the middle of the night for the fun of Black Friday shopping.
- friends who share their turkey fryer, so that we too may enjoy unhealthy goodness!

In fact, I am grateful for all of my friends, we truly have so many great friends that will be just as excited as us when H comes home.

~ family
- mostly my sweet, adorable perfect children and husband. They love me unconditionally and make me whole.
- our extended family. Of course a big part of that is mentioned above in our friends who are like a family. But also, those we got via the powers that be. They never make for a dull moment & they take us as we are (whether they want to or not.)
- H! Because even though he is far away he is family, and this is the last Thanksgiving we will celebrate without him.

~ my health and the health of my loved ones.
~ my job, I have one, it is fulfilling and never boring.
- amazing co-workers that better fall into the category of friends.

Life, I am thankful for life, I love this time of year. A time of thankfulness, a time of giving. And especially days like today, good friends, good times, good weather.

I could take or leave the bitter cold, so I am thankful for a Fall like day today.

Now, I shall go and be subjected to the VT/UVA game, with S (die hard UVA fan) & a VT fan present, should be interesting. Hoping my children don't learn any new choice words in the next 3 hours!

Thank you.

Ramblings...

I am horrible at coming up with titles for my posts, the end. But rambling is what I usually, so I am going with that. Years down the road I will wonder why I called every 4th post some variation of the word!
Anyway, 1st I want to say WE GOT MORE PICTURES!!! And they are from his foster home, and he is smiling, yes smiling in several. In fact in one he is making the "cheese face." In another he is riding in one of those L*ittle Tikes cars, a police car to be exact. Those that know us might know that we have the exact same one, so that made me happy. Something familiar for him when he gets home! He also has his photo album GG made him and he is sitting or laying intently checking us out! Yay! Speaking of coming home, time seems to finally be moving now, and spring doesn't seem nearly as far away.

In other news, we are preparing for the loss of a loved one. One of S's family members is nearing the end of a hard fight with cancer. Mortality is hard. We are sad but hope to maintain the memories of her contribution to the amazing man my husband is present in our lives. It is leading to some hard conversations at our house, ones I wish we never had to have. I saw something today that is really resonating in my mind: "love the people God gave you, because He will need them back one day."

One last ramble, something important to all people, whether we realize it or not. I have a dear, amazing friend, I will call her "Fluffy". She is amazingly talented, smart, hilarious and thought provoking. She has a blog (sort of several) and I think everyone should check it out. http://dayeseye.typepad.com/make_change/. Check it out, think about the change you can make in the world around you. I have made change for people, I didn't always realize it or even mean to in the moment, but I have. And I feel amazing. And you know what? It wasn't even that hard. Doing what felt right in my heart in that moment made a difference.
So to you "Fluffy" you have made change in my life, as simple as fixing this blog, to lending a sympathetic ear. So, thank you.

Love those dear to you, make change in the lives around you & enjoy life.

*ps...typing on an IPad is difficult, so don't judge :)*

UPDATE!!!!

Today I shall focus on M, which I feel like I haven't done enough of.  We got 4 new pictures today from his 14 month well boy visit, and a progress report.  Man, he gets cuter and cuter and CUTER every time we get pictures.  In one he is pointing at the camera, I love those pictures, as if they understand fully that they are the subject being captured.
In the progress report it says there are MORE pictures taken at the foster home that they will be sending!!  I am GIDDY!  I am so in love with that sweet face, I just go gaga every time we get new pictures.  And then I feel sad because I know it will be awhile til we get more, but this time it sounds like it might be sooner than normal!  We also have the cameras sitting waiting to be mailed off.  I now realize that he might not get this package until close to Christmas, so I might need to cram more in there!
So the progress report says some interesting things.  I.E. things that tell me he is meant to be a C.  He is still just barely walking, only a couple steps here and there.  Well around here, the C children ALL waiting until after 12 months to walk, T waiting until 14 months (too lazy to be bothered)! 2nd, he is independent, and gets angry when his FM tries to help him.  Well he and Buggy will certainly have that in common.  Now T, as stated above, is happy for others to do for her (wait on her royalty really) but the others are all about independence.  He like to sleep, 2 naps plus 9pm-6am...LIKE!  And he can throw a good tantrum....Greeaaat.  That is just what we need here, another tantrum thrower.  Really, I love it!  It means he does and will voice his opinion, and well the C family definitely all voice there opinion, ask anyone that knows us!
M isn't so little anymore.  He is over 21 pounds!  And boy that sweet, sweet face.

I have been asked a number of times from several people if we know when we will bring him home.  That isn't an easy question to answer.  I know he won't be home for Christmas (even though it is our only wish) and definitely not before the New Year. Our agency quotes "up to 14 months" after referral.  Our referral went to Korea March 28th, that means May 28th--ish.  I am hoping, wishing praying, pleading, begging that it is closer to 12 months, but realistically, 14 months.  I respect that.  He is worth the wait and, while I hate missing out on every second he isn't here, I know once he is home, the wait will be a distant memory. I hope that it will be much like childbirth, very painful, but once you have that sweet baby, you are willing to go through it again.
There are advantages to it still being many months away, and I try to focus on them when I am not pouting (see previous posts).  S can actually get around to learning Korean, like he wants to.  I can learn a couple words, which is about all I am capable of!  He is safe, healthy and loved where he is, getting exposed to Korea and it's culture, so we will use this time to learn the same.  T & my birthday is in May, so it would be an AMAZING birthday present to have him here, I get so excited thinking about that.  If it is late May, he will be here in time for summer, which will be an easier time for both S and I to be off, T will be out of school, and we can enjoy the beautiful outdoors that surrounds us where we live. 
So there is my "looking at the bright side of things" attitude.  As I told my SW, as long as he DOES come home, I will be happy.  As I have said a couple times, this is a HUGE lesson in patience for me, one that may slightly lack any.patience.at.all.
So YAY for updates, YAY for a safe foster family, YAY for our HS update (boo for more $$, but it means we are getting there).  YAY for fall, my favorite season.  YAY for a beautiful, beautiful baby that one day will snuggle next to me on the couch while I write on here!

October 15th

http://www.october15th.com/

Please take some time to participate and remember.
I have not experienced a loss personally, but know many who have, and to them my thoughts.

Patience

Patience. I have none.  This week we were contacted by our agency that it is time to get ready for our homestudy update.  That means we have been approved for almost a year.  And it is frustrating to know that we have many more months of waiting to go.  I want to go get our boy, sooner rather than later.  I want to know his personality. 
We get very limited info in the few updates we have gotten.  I know that it isn't any one person's fault, and I know I should be grateful for the info we do have.  I bet I sound bratty, and I can own that.  This is hard.  I saw another blog yesterday and was thrilled to see that family had received many, many pictures of their little guy, and some videos.  I know that means so much to waiting parents.  It made me think.  Is M getting the same love and attention that this little guy was obviously getting.  I have noticed some things in the little info we have gotten that has made me ask some questions about M and his "development."  I don't feel like we have gotten satisfactory answers so far, and maybe there aren't any until we meet him, but it does cause me pause.  Not huge pause, but still a nagging thought, concern, question.  I may be wrong but I can't help but think more info, pictures, maybe a video could shed some light and help put me at ease.
Patience...adoption is definitely a practice in patience.  Oh which, if you know me you know, I have NONE.  Grrrr. 
M we love you, and I hope one day we will all look back on these posts and laugh, for now I will be practicing my patience.